Freedom & Cowboy Boots
Freedom – lots of meanings are tied to this word but today I’m thinking, lack of restrictions, to come and go and be… and the ability to stand on one’s own, unsustained by anything. This morning I sit here preparing for the weekend at TCH with a little hesitancy as last night we got a call from our Doc to talk about some things like the upcoming stem cell retraction, this round of drugs and their side effects, his hearing test tomorrow, and mostly the fact that although Jake’s counts were recovering well when we went in on Monday, they were low, and depending on today’s labs, we may not be admitted this afternoon, afterall. She wanted us to be prepared. Labs will tell. It’s Murphy’s Law, ya know??? We pack and counts will be low, we don’t and counts will be on target. So we pack and stay on plan. If we’re not admitted today, then we’re home for the weekend and we try again Monday. To be honest, I’m OK with that. It pushes our schedule back some, but actually, it would push it enough that we might not be worried with our near Christmas exit. This is a very busy month for Jake… 2 chemotherapy treatments and his stem cell harvest – that puts us at three different hospital stays for December. Anxiety is high. We have a lot going on this weekend too… Cameron’s science fair is due Monday. It’s a BIG deal, it’s not ready, and I can’t help him with it if I’m not here. The girls have Talent Show tomorrow night, Ryan has a birthday party to attend on Saturday and our church’s women’s event, Advent By Candle Light is on Sunday evening. Many things that I’d love to be a part of and things that Henry will have to do on his own. Things that a few weeks ago would have been just another weekend of activities… “no brainers” on how we would get everyone where they needed to be and enjoy the weekend. It’s freedom to come and go – something that we took for granted and are now very aware of. Last night I had to go
ago… Jake in his cowboy boots, his chubby little legs and booty, running around in all of his half-naked, free-spirited and all-boy, gun slinging, down and dirty, goofyness. They made me think of FREEDOM. So, I’m kinda at a loss of what to pray for today… my heart wants to be home this weekend where we can have some freedom to be part of our family’s activities but I do understand the importance of keeping Jake on track so that he can have HIS freedom back. So I let go and we’ll go with God’s will. He knows best and what happens today, happens. Either way, we are pushing forward to the future… fighting hard for days of freedom and little boy’s dirty, fun-loving cowboy boots. “All battles are fought by scared men who’d rather be some place else.” – John Wayne, In Harm’s Way
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Comments (4)
Tracy
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Just LOVE that picture!!!! His cute surfer hair!!! Sooooo huggable!!!
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Laura
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Hi Mardon! I have been following your blog and praying for Jake! I would be glad to come and stay with Jake while you got out to run some errands and play with him, read or watch movies (or even grocery shop for you!). I can even help out with the others if needed. I cant imagine how overwhelmed you are and the fear of him near all the germs out there! We are members of Trinity and my boys who are his age put together a package of dinosaur things for Jake and hope he liked them 🙂 Please call me and I would feel blessed to be able to help your family in anyway I can 281-541-8121
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Shana Wallace
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Wow, Mardon, so well said…thank you for the reminder to never take any of our blessings, especially one as huge but so easily taken for granted. Love you so much and constant prayers of comfort, strength, peace for you all and extra special prayers of healing for Jake!!
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Lindsey
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thank you for this. feeling very thankful for my freedom today. it really is a blessing. and i prayed for you guys on my way to school this morning. Hoping that you and Jake have a peaceful weekend/week ahead. Love you
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